How To Stop Absorbing Other People’s Energy

Mary Kay ParkinsonEmotional And Mental Health, Energy Healing11 Comments

  HSPs frequently ask me how to protect themselves from other people’s energy.  I always tell them that there is no quick and easy answer. People are frequently looking for a shield or want to learn how to create an energy bubble.  The truth is, if you know your own issues, then other people’s issues can’t stay attached to you, or not for long.  You need to do your personal work. For me, that personal work involved many years of therapy.  I loved this process because as an HSP I enjoy looking inside and sorting out what I find.  I had been depressed for most of my life until I took the time to go through this deep inner process that helped to clarify and reframe my issues and experiences.  Out of that inner work I developed a deep capacity to protect myself through being centered in myself and therefore naturally knowing (or being able to sort out) what belongs to me and what belongs to someone else.  I also grew to love myself and my sensitivity, as well as trust in my own heart to guide me. Inner Work Will Help You To Stop Absorbing Other People’s Energy Recently I saw an exceptional video by Ralph Smart on how to stop absorbing other people’s energy. Have a look! He gave the best answer to “How to stop absorbing other people’s energy” that I have ever heard.  I like his video because he doesn’t try to oversimplify the process, and yet gets right to the heart of the core issues involved, including loving yourself.   And here is a summary of what Ralph has to say: Remember you can’t please everyone.  Accept that not everyone is going to like you.  Once you get past that, then you can stop absorbing … Read More

Love Your Defenses!

Maria HillEmotional And Mental Health, Personal Development, Social Anxiety0 Comments

So many defenses. I feel like my life is often about bumping into defenses of one kind or another. Dealing with defenses feels like walking through a field of hay.  With each step you meet  a new stalk(defense) that obscures your vision and parts as you walk only to reveal a new defense. Often the defenses I bump into are the defenses of other people. I dislike bumping into them because in doing so the relationships changes – often not for the better. When defenses show themselves, the relationship door usually closes even if only for a moment and we realize we are not welcome. That happens to highly sensitive people a lot. Of course, sometime defenses are our own because we get hurt and our healing is not easy. What Are Defense Mechanisms? According to Dictionary, a defense mechanism is an unconscious process, like denial, that protects an individual from unacceptable or painful ideas or impulses. Defenses are a way for us to: like ourselves in painful circumstances make sense of something that does not work for us  taking care of ourselves. Defenses can sometime be a kind of denial. Denial has a bad reputation because it is interpreted to mean that there is something wrong with you, that your are too weak to face the truth about something. Denial like all defenses are often meant to protect us from a shock to our systems, and sense of loss that we are unable to process and handle. Defenses Can Create A Healing Space I respect defenses even if I consider them to be toxic sometimes; I understand that they have a purpose. In the case of people who have suffered a serious trauma they can be life saving by creating a space for the healing process. I don’t think anyone should be denied their healing space. We highly sensitive people are often harmed, … Read More

The Paths We Travel Working With Our Sensitivity

Edward BonapartianEmotional And Mental Health, Uncategorized11 Comments

“All of life is a circle” my meditation teacher tells me during a discussion on  the lessons life often presents; “Regardless of the starting point, at one time or another life’s circumstances will always steer you back to similar circumstances; if for no other reason than to allow awareness of the progress of one’s own journey.” In my memory of that conversation, the point he made lingers.While time has shown me that it is all too easy for the Highly Sensitive to fall prey to any negative emotions generated during these experiences, over time I have realized that it is actually our sensitivity which plays a key role in also allowing us to recognize the lessons in growth contained within the experience. Similar to a double edged sword, our sensitivity can hinder or benefit us; it all depends on how we work with our sensitivity. Working With Our Sensitivity Working with our sensitivity may seem like a strange concept. Similar to how we work with our sleep dreams, we can be passive or proactive with the experience. The key here is in recognizing that being a Highly Sensitive Person is not an identity as our ego’s would have us believe. Instead, it is simply an aspect of our energetic makeup which in itself has different aspects; one of which is intuition. Sensitivity and intuition often go hand in hand. A favorite teacher of mine put it succinctly when she  commented” It’s all about energy” when I had asked her where intuition comes from. As I exited the building where our meditation class was held, I saw the lone figure of a friend, Kira, sitting on a bench by the Koi pond.  A tall, thin blond in her sixties, Kira held herself with a quiet dignity that I often admired. As I walked … Read More

Protect Your Life Force: Awareness For HSPs

Maria HillEmotional And Mental Health, Energy Healing0 Comments

Our life force is our energy. As a highly sensitive person, I am very energy sensitive as I am sure you are. Being energy sensitive means noticing the claims and demands on our energy from others. Protecting our life force and being good stewards of our life gift is our job. However being an HSP makes this a particularly challenging job. There are many ways to deal with interpersonal claims for our time and energy. One way is to be aware of ways in which someone can try to lay claim to our life force. Ways Of Laying Claim To The Life Force Of Another There are many ways to lay claim to the energies of another person. Some you will have experienced and others you may use yourself. This list is not exhaustive but it will help you notice when it is happening: expectations. This is one we all do at some point or another, perhaps even all the time. We form expectations and they then run our relationships. fear. One of the easiest ways to lay claim to another’s life force is by creating fear, or putting your fear on them. guilt. One of the big energy thieves of modern life, with guilt we put the burden of our life on someone else. promises. When we make promises and do not keep them, we are stealing someone else’s life force, by pretending a level of relationship that we are not willing to maintain. demands. When we make demands, we are being entitled to the time, energy and labor of another. values. Values are a very useful tool in managing our lives and commitments. However, when we impose our values on others we are demanding that they live on our terms. Even if we have great values, it is important to honor the dignity … Read More

Subtle Energies – The Path To Health

Maria HillAyurveda, Energy Healing, Physical Health2 Comments

Subtle energies are what you notice when you are in stillness. Subtle energies are precious information. Subtle energies have truth in them, but they don’t scream and yell their message. They are there to be discerned. Subtle energies are where highly sensitive people live. A Lost Skill Subtle energies require good listening skills. Somewhere in the progress of the human race, we seem to have stopped listening. Our early ancestors may not have had our material sophistication but they knew how to listen to the energies around them. A tracker for a tribe, any hunter, and shaman or medicine man knew about subtle energy and what the various energies meant. Their knowledge was a matter of life and death. Subtle energies are fluid and moving. They are not tied to anything. They just are. Subtle energies are present everywhere and in everything. They include everything. They include time, space, materiality, qualities – hard, soft etc., attitude, and direction. Subtle energies are our path to the flow state. They are also our window to the connection of mind and body that many of us have lost. Subtle Energies At Work One of the best examples of a great use of subtle energies is Ayurveda, the ancient holistic healing system. Ayurveda categorizes everything by subtle energies.  Each of the three human body types of doshas is a group of subtle energies.  All three exist in each of us in different combinations. When Ayurveda suggests food for a dosha, it is recommending the best subtle energy choices that will support health in a particular individual. Each of the seasons and stages of life represent different subtle energies as well. This is the reason that Ayurveda has become a great resource for people seeking a way to manage their health themselves. Understanding subtle energies … Read More

4 Steps To Emotional Health

Maria HillEmotional And Mental Health1 Comment

If you struggle with processing your feelings you are not alone. As an HSP, it is often difficult to handle so many strong, overwhelming emotions. When too many  emotions remain unprocessed they can lead to emotional blocks. However, we sensitives are blessed with the gift of introspection.  It may seem like a curse at times but it is actually an advantage. Why? Because for highly sensitive people the mundane task of processing our emotions is what leads us to wisdom. Step 1: Learn Where Energy Blocks Come From According to Yogi Amrit Desai, founder of Kripalu Yoga in a June, 2010 article in Natural Awakenings, Healing the Root Cause of Addiction with Ayurveda A Natural Cure for Unhealthy Dependence by Linda Sechrist,  “…stressors—thoughts and reactions to our lifestyle, relationships, work environment and family life—are introduced through the ego mind. Emotionally charged thoughts and feelings of blame, shame or guilt then get metabolized into our biological body system. Stored in the form of toxins and neuro-glandular imbalances, these feelings create energy blocks that prevent the free flow of energy, or prana, the body’s self-healing wisdom. Energy blocks may take the form of muscular tensions and weakness in liver, kidney and digestive functions. Gradual decline results in a progressive deterioration of biological processes and consequently can manifest in external symptoms of fatigue, fear, anxiety and insecurity.” Step 2: Embrace Emotional Metabolism Metabolism comes from the greek word ” metabole” for change or transformation. At any given time as we interact with our world we are in the process of metabolism – of perceptions, thoughts, feelings, emotions as well as material substances such as food and water. All forms of life engage in metabolism, from plants to humans. When we are unable to metabolize a food it will clog our bodies. When we are unable to metabolize or process emotions, they will … Read More