The Power Of Rituals For An HSP

Kathryn NulfEmotional And Mental Health, Stress26 Comments

There was a good year where I listened to the same album every night as I drifted off to sleep. I didn’t get tired of it. I loved knowing what to expect. I knew the order of the songs, the way things started and the way the music progressed. I loved having something familiar there for me night after night before sleep. It was my way of being there for myself again and again. The songs had meaning, sure. I felt their melodies more than the words though, deep to my core. At the time, I did not know what highly sensitive person (HSP) was. I just knew that I went through life feeling things very intensely. I loved to know what to expect. I loved familiarity as I was in a strange place away at college. And listening to the same album every night was my normal. It felt perfectly natural to me. It was when I shared it with others that I got a “Huh?” kind of response. I don’t know why, but I thought they would be able to relate, as if they were doing it, too. It just felt so natural to me that I assumed it did for everyone else. Why HSPs Need Rituals For HSPs, having daily rituals in their lives can help them find balance feel at one with their world, instead of just being overwhelmed by it most of the time. Having that album play each night before sleep was my start to embracing rituals in my life. Rituals can have a profound impact on us HPSs: they calm and ground us, soothe the spirit, slow us down, remind us to live in the present moment, nourish our soul, and remind us that we are responsible for our own well-being. Think about … Read More

Being Present: All You Really Need

Maria HillEmotional And Mental Health, Personal Development4 Comments

Being present is often treated as something to strive for. It is a kind of Holy Grail of spirituality and well being. Being present is where you live when your head is out of the way. Why is it so elusive? How Our Heads Get In The Way It never ceases to amaze me how much our heads get in the way of living well and enjoying life. It happens so innocently, too. Our heads which are in the business of helping us and trying to make sure we survive, grapple with our environments and questions about our lives and ourselves in an attempt to make our lives worthwhile. Our brains start at a very young age with the business of making meaning. Our immature brains do not know that when we are young we are unable to fully make meaning. However, our young brains are undaunted by what we do not know and plunge into the complex waters of meaning. Our meaning makers bump up against the meaning makers of our parents and families as well as our cultures. A lot of mistakes get made in the area of meaning, resulting in prejudice and stereotypes that we then have to work awfully hard to eradicate. Once we have made meaning, then we continually work with that meaning as we make a life in the world. So we are often drawn back to the past as we try to come to terms with mistaken conclusions we have formed about ourselves and others. So naturally being present is out of the question. How we made meaning can affect our view of the future and whether or not we over focus on the future. If we learned to dread our environment as a child we may have a recurring and habitual dread … Read More

How Reiki Helps Depression

Maria HillDiseases, Emotional And Mental Health, Energy Healing2 Comments

Can depression be treated? Can depression sufferers find relief without medication? Understanding Depression I think depression is very misunderstood. So often it is treated as a defect or a personality problem. Studies have shown that long term depression comes from the way our brains develop in childhood. The implication is that adverse childhood conditions of abuse or serious neglect, living with problems that we cannot control and cannot solve create changes in how our brains function and  can cause depression. Covering Up Depression Doesn’t Work So often we think that when we are not feeling well, that the solution is a trip to the doctor or emergency room. We naturally seek a way to get rid of the pain. Sometimes we medicate ourselves with food, drink, entertainment and other diversions. It doesn’t work. The distractions don’t last for long and then the problem returns and we end up feeling even worse; however they have the negative effect of causing us to feel like failures because we do not seem to be able to control our lives and ourselves. Different Types Of Depression The vicious cycle occurs because we often do not understand the problem we are trying to solve. Depression can come from a number of sources and we need to educate ourselves before we can create the changes we need. There are different kinds of depressions but they generally fall into two categories: situational depressions like job loss or losing a friend that are temporary although painful chronic forms of depression which is caused by life conditions. Chronic depression arises when we have unresolved negative feelings, often as a result of our childhoods, that make us feel sad, bad and hopeless. Unfortunately, chronic depression can change the way our brain works and make it more difficult for us to get … Read More

How To Stop Absorbing Other People’s Energy

Mary Kay ParkinsonEmotional And Mental Health, Energy Healing11 Comments

  HSPs frequently ask me how to protect themselves from other people’s energy.  I always tell them that there is no quick and easy answer. People are frequently looking for a shield or want to learn how to create an energy bubble.  The truth is, if you know your own issues, then other people’s issues can’t stay attached to you, or not for long.  You need to do your personal work. For me, that personal work involved many years of therapy.  I loved this process because as an HSP I enjoy looking inside and sorting out what I find.  I had been depressed for most of my life until I took the time to go through this deep inner process that helped to clarify and reframe my issues and experiences.  Out of that inner work I developed a deep capacity to protect myself through being centered in myself and therefore naturally knowing (or being able to sort out) what belongs to me and what belongs to someone else.  I also grew to love myself and my sensitivity, as well as trust in my own heart to guide me. Inner Work Will Help You To Stop Absorbing Other People’s Energy Recently I saw an exceptional video by Ralph Smart on how to stop absorbing other people’s energy. Have a look! He gave the best answer to “How to stop absorbing other people’s energy” that I have ever heard.  I like his video because he doesn’t try to oversimplify the process, and yet gets right to the heart of the core issues involved, including loving yourself.   And here is a summary of what Ralph has to say: Remember you can’t please everyone.  Accept that not everyone is going to like you.  Once you get past that, then you can stop absorbing … Read More

Love Your Defenses!

Maria HillEmotional And Mental Health, Personal Development0 Comments

So many defenses. I feel like my life is often about bumping into defenses of one kind or another. Dealing with defenses feels like walking through a field of hay.  With each step you meet  a new stalk(defense) that obscures your vision and parts as you walk only to reveal a new defense. Often the defenses I bump into are the defenses of other people. I dislike bumping into them because in doing so the relationships changes – often not for the better. When defenses show themselves, the relationship door usually closes even if only for a moment and we realize we are not welcome. That happens to highly sensitive people a lot. Of course, sometime defenses are our own because we get hurt and our healing is not easy. What Are Defense Mechanisms? According to Dictionary, a defense mechanism is an unconscious process, like denial, that protects an individual from unacceptable or painful ideas or impulses. Defenses are a way for us to: like ourselves in painful circumstances make sense of something that does not work for us  taking care of ourselves. Defenses can sometime be a kind of denial. Denial has a bad reputation because it is interpreted to mean that there is something wrong with you, that your are too weak to face the truth about something. Denial like all defenses are often meant to protect us from a shock to our systems, and sense of loss that we are unable to process and handle. Defenses Can Create A Healing Space I respect defenses even if I consider them to be toxic sometimes; I understand that they have a purpose. In the case of people who have suffered a serious trauma they can be life saving by creating a space for the healing process. I don’t think anyone should be denied their healing space. We highly sensitive people are often harmed, … Read More

The Paths We Travel Working With Our Sensitivity

Edward BonapartianEmotional And Mental Health, The HSP Trait11 Comments

“All of life is a circle” my meditation teacher tells me during a discussion on  the lessons life often presents; “Regardless of the starting point, at one time or another life’s circumstances will always steer you back to similar circumstances; if for no other reason than to allow awareness of the progress of one’s own journey.” In my memory of that conversation, the point he made lingers. While time has shown me that it is all too easy for the Highly Sensitive to fall prey to any negative emotions generated during these experiences, over time I have realized that it is actually our sensitivity which plays a key role in also allowing us to recognize the lessons in growth contained within the experience. Similar to a double edged sword, our sensitivity can hinder or benefit us; it all depends on how we are working with our sensitivity. Working With Our Sensitivity Working with our sensitivity may seem like a strange concept. Similar to how we work with our sleep dreams, we can be passive or proactive with the experience. The key here is in recognizing that being a Highly Sensitive Person is not an identity as our ego’s would have us believe. Instead, it is simply an aspect of our energetic makeup which in itself has different aspects; one of which is intuition. Sensitivity and intuition often go hand in hand. A favorite teacher of mine put it succinctly when she  commented” It’s all about energy” when I had asked her where intuition comes from. As I exited the building where our meditation class was held, I saw the lone figure of a friend, Kira, sitting on a bench by the Koi pond.  A tall, thin blond in her sixties, Kira held herself with a quiet dignity that I often admired. As I … Read More